quarterlifecrisis.

I messed up my shoulder at yoga last Monday, and have been feeling the consequences ever since.  I keep trying to tell myself it's better that I pushed myself and got hurt, than to keep giving a minimum effort just so not to feel the results.  I believe that's true in most areas of life, that you need to push yourself to find out what your capable of... you almost always will surprise yourself.  It's hard to do, and even when it ends out like this (a sprained shoulder) it's still worth it in the end.  I left practice on Monday feeling the best I've felt, feeling like I had accomplished the most yet.  But... it is frustrating that now I can't go to any more classes this week due to my stupid shoulder.

...at least we won at dodgeball.

I wrote this last week and forgot to post, so I'll just keep adding... I'm back to yoga today, hurray!

This week is going to drag by because I can't wait until Friday!  Booked my tattoo for then on Saturday, and I'm stooooooooked.  I'll post a picture.

The Olympics are over, and I feel lost without them.  My point of obsession has ceased to exist. *sigh*

I'm in a weird head space lately.  I'm so confused about what makes me happy, and what I want to do/get out of my life.  I sent in my application to MRU today for September, and my UofC one is still pending.  I'm so afraid of staying here forever, never going anywhere or doing anything.  I feel like I'm running out of time to do the things I want to do... but I don't even know what those are.  I'm scared to make a big change, but terrified of what happens if I don't.  I feel like I've had this ominous cloud of dread hanging over me for years, and I don't know how to even begin to go about fixing it.  I'm trying to do more of the things I want to do, instead of trying to please everyone else all the time.  It helps, but it just doesn't seem to be enough.  Some days I feel fantastic, and happy, and like the whole world is just right... but some days I feel like I'm spinning my wheels, getting more and more stuck in this muddy rut I'm trapped in.

Maybe this is all normal.  Maybe this is just what life feels like.

But I sure wish it felt like the whole world was just right all the time.