honolulu, kathmandu

When you think of a broken heart, what do you think of?  I always thought a heart would break in one instance... like a great event would cause it to break so noticeably you couldn't possibly miss it.  Like there would be a huge surge of pain, followed by an inescapable throbbing that wouldn't stop.

But now I think differently.

I think a heart breaks slowly, a little piece at a time.  Chunks break off a piece at a time, until all of a sudden, before you know it, the damage is done.  One day you wake up feeling great, and something small takes off one last chunk... and suddenly, it's broken.

Enter the inescapable throbbing.

Heart break.  Heart broken.  Heart ache.

Now comes the hard part... if it's broken one piece at a time, how can you find the cause; the culprit; the one to blame.

Can you?

Can you hang the heart break on one person; one event; one cause?  Or are we all to blame for our own heart ache?  For allowing these small hurts, betrayals, jabs, lies, promises, loves, events to add up.  For letting them take a piece of us, however so small.  For allowing them the luxury of our tears.

Our pain.

Our heart.

Can we stop breaking our own hearts?

Or is this the price we pay to feel loved... to more often then not, not feel loved at all.